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How To Safely Put a Baby or Toddler On Your Back in a Baby Carrier

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When people see me swinging my babies over my hip, so I can strap them into a baby carrier, they sometimes look a bit worried that I might drop my kids! If only they could know that I’ve done this motion probably thousands of times. Here are two ways to put a baby or toddler on your back.

When you first start, you may want to practice in front of a mirror, or over a bed or couch, or with a spotter (someone to guide you). And, make sure your baby has good neck and back control before wearing them in a carrier like the one I’m showing. The brand of carrier in the video is an Ergo and the model is called an Adapt.

Wearing kids on your back is so great because it frees up your hands even more by allowing more movement. I also love it, because once a baby gets to be a certain weight, front wearing can make your back hurt like you’re perpetually pregnant. I back wear mostly to save my back!

Society’s Screen and Social Media Obsession: It Will Change

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My husband and I were talking about kids and screens. He’s eighteen years older than me. I told him, “You know, I don’t think kids are going to be obsessed with screens and social media when they’re older, because even I’m getting sick of them.” He said, “Of course they won’t. There will be something new to take over!

He told me how when he was a kid, it was the phone. Then, it was TV.

Do you remember our mothers talking on the phone? They talked on the phone for HOURS!

They watched TV.

They read books and the newspapers.

Then, computers came along and they played solitaire. Then, chat rooms. Then mobile phones and texting with one hand holding the phone while driving (yikes, I used to all the time).

So, what’s so different about our usage of screens and social media we’re all obsessed with right now? Probably nothing, I predict. In fact, I wouldn’t be surprised if in twenty years, the thought of posting about your dinner on facebook and instagram becomes laughable.

Having these super powerful tiny ‘computers‘ that do everything in the palm of our hands, is a new thing for now. Our society hasn’t fully gotten used to this new handheld omnipotent gadget yet. Actually, many of us are still learning that it’s not a smart idea to stare at your screen while you’re crossing the road! Sort of like how it took society a few years to realise that holding your phone while driving needed to be illegal…

Eventually, people will start realising, there’s nothing there… staring at a screen and posting photos of your life and looking at photos of other’s lives will eventually get old. I actually can’t wait for the hashtag to go out of style. Ha! Over time, the technology will change and the way we use the technology will change.

When I was about 12 years old, I remember shutting myself my room and playing this video game for hours a day! It’s all I wanted to do. A year or two later, I wouldn’t have spent a second playing it. It got old.

A lot of people have pre-digital technology nostalgia. Weren’t people were so much more ‘present‘ back in the ‘golden olden days‘… you know, when the dads used to hide behind newspapers at the breakfast table or smoking a pipe and listening to the radio. Yup… nope.

That tendency in society to disconnect from reality has always been there! Just in different forms. Smartphones are powerful tools. All at once, they instantly connect us with friends, family and the world. They’re our phone, our camera, our weather forecast, our email, entertainment, a calculator, a flashlight… and Siri has the answer for every werido question my 5 year old comes up with.

Eventually, most people will eventually learn to regulate, but right now, these toys are new and exciting. Read the rest of this entry

Power Reversal Games: Helping Kids to Connect and Cooperate

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We were sitting at the table, eating dinner, when my 19 month old son initiated a game that he’s done many times before.

He raised his arms up, then we all raised our arms up. Then, he clapped his hands, and we all clapped our hands. The raised his arms, we copied. It was such a simple type of game, yet one that is so powerful and the whole family plays along because we know how important this type of play can be.

He was so happy playing this game!

This sort of play is called a power reversal game.

Do you know why this sort of game is so powerful??

Because, being a little kid is frustrating! Think about how many times we make a child do things they don’t want to do in one single day. We make our kids take a bath, brush their teeth, get dressed, stop playing, get in the car, get out of the car, etc. To make all this accidental ‘bossing‘ around we do worse, a very young child can’t even verbalise their approval or disapproval of what we’re making them do. Which means, that they often have to resort to crying, screaming, and physically resisting the things they don’t want to do! And, when our children behave like that, then they are met with our own disapproval of their behaviour.

Talk about frustration for the child! Read the rest of this entry

Timeliness: That Window of Opportunity That Mothers Can’t Ignore

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I know some dads get it too… but in our house, it’s me. I’m always the one with the master plan in my head.

I know exactly how many milliseconds we need to leave the house by, before someone has to pee again, or before someone gets hungry, or before someone spills something on their clothes, or before someone wants to start building an 800 piece lego masterpiece.

Don’t tell me to hang on a sec while you figure something out on the computer, or you that you need to spend 10 minutes in the bathroom. Because, the time to leave is NOW! Especially… ESPECIALLY, when I have a baby.

Ok, ok, I know I need to relax. There’s no reason to rush…

But, I’m not rushing! I’m simply a super aware freak mum, who knows more about how my children feel and more about what they need, than is probably good for me! They were with me for nine months in the womb, and I fretted 24/7 over them for the first year or two of their lives. I KNOW these little people too well.

I KNOW things like, if we don’t get out of the shops in exactly 4.38 minutes, then dinner won’t get started, then the baths will be late, then the kids will go to sleep late, then the middle one will have night terrors because she’ll be over tired. Yes, all this JUST from leaving the shops a little too late.

And, I know that if we don’t leave the house NOW, then the 2 year old is going to fall to sleep in the car, but it will only be a micro nap, and then the good nap is spoiled and then I don’t get a break all day and then not only is the 2 year old cranky later, but I TURN INTO A RAVING LUNATIC!

Planning falls apart, I know that. And, it’s good to be spontaneous! Yes, I get all that and practice it daily. But, I have to be in the mood for it… I have to have the energy for breakdowns and meltdowns and missed sleep and so on.

So, I know, I seem like I’m keeping a secret schedule, or that I have an hidden agenda to be in control. And it sounds like I’m a super anal freak! What it is, is that I’m sharp and alert and I need to keep this little family unit running as smoothly as possible. It’s my inborn, slightly perfectionist yet nurturing, nature, that keeps me on a schedule the way I do.

When that window of opportunity presents itself, I need to make a move! And, if I don’t, and you see me getting uptight, now you know why.

 

Kids Don’t ‘Fight’ Sleep: Here’s What’s Happening

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Sorry if the title irritated you. Because we’ve all experienced kids ‘fighting‘ sleep and we ‘know‘ they’re fighting it, right?? And, OMG, is it annoying!! But, are they really fighting it, or is there something else going on?

My oldest daughter would have been dumped in the category of one who ‘fights sleep‘. Honestly, from the day she was born, those beady little eyes would pop open and STAY open for way longer than I thought was humanly (or newbornly) possible. She’s 8 years old and she still has the tendency to want to know what’s going on at every moment of the day. She would rather walk around with her eyes hanging out of her head than admit she’s tired. Aren’t a lot of kids this way? But… when she gets like that I know there’s something going on.

Sleep is a natural phenomena and it can should happen easily, without any tricks or training.

There are a few things that a child needs in order to easily drift off to sleep. Sometimes, our modern life does not lend itself to good sleeping. By trying to make our kids independent and through overstimulating, etc. our kid’s sleep can suffer. Read the rest of this entry

What’s With Kids These Days?

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You know what’s the problem with kids these days?

Nothing.

Absolutely nothing.

People can cry all they want about the technology, kid’s exposure to this and to that. How kids disrespect their parents and teachers (I know about the second one first hand).

Well, I’m not saying those things help. But, you know what? Kids are the same today as they were 50 years ago. They’re the same as they were 500 years ago.

Kids are all born amazing. They’re smart. They’re creative. They’re naturally friendly and cooperative (REALLY! more on this later). They’re free thinkers. In fact, I can’t think of any other time in history when we’ve had so many free thinking adults in our society, and those free thinking adults all used to be kids who one day grew up. Oh, and kids also all have the ability to drive us insane.

I bet you think YOU are a free thinker and reasonable adult, right? Yet once upon a time, some adult was sitting there thinking about your generation and wondering what was wrong with the kids from your era. The same people calling the kids of today ‘entitled brats‘ are the same people who were being called ‘entitled brats‘ 30 years ago.

So, then it’s the parent’s fault, right? That’s what’s making kids so rotten. Read the rest of this entry

That Time We Packed Our Bags and Left America Forever

 

Ok, it wasn’t forever… we’ve been back twice to visit.

It’s hard to write a post like this without sounding like I’m bashing America. But, given the political climate of the USA at the moment, I feel compelled to tell our story and it’s gonna sound like bashing no matter how nicely I say it. It’s important to keep in mind that when comparing one developed western nation to another, it’s sort of like comparing apples to apples. They’re all nice, just some are a little better than others, depending on what you prefer. Read the rest of this entry

I’m Not Trying To Replicate My Childhood for My Children

My childhood was great. It was American as apple pie (Sort of, except I was always a bit of the odd ball, but aren’t we all).

I played a lot outdoors, rode my bike everywhere. We lived in a tiny cookie cutter house, we had a yard, a cat, (a dog at some point). I played in the snow. Kids picked on me at school and I ‘toughened up‘ to get past it. I had plenty of friends, I went to school, (school that I wasn’t sure if I hated or liked, but there was no other option so I never even thought twice about it). I had friends, and with the friends came the drama and gossip. I played soccer, we played man hunt with the neighbourhood kids. I played the piano (barely). We ate pizzas on Fridays. As we got older, we were all encouraged to do well in school so that we could go university so we could get a job… There was no mention of an alternative.

And, it was fine! My childhood was perfect because it shaped me into who I am today.

But. my kid’s childhood looks radically different. And, although I had a great childhood, there’s no way I’m going to try and recreate my childhood for my own kids.

Not only do we live 10,000 miles away from where I grew up, but we do things different. And, this life for them, is perfect for them because it is what it is. The nostalgia of my childhood doesn’t mean anything to them and it doesn’t have to mean anything to them! My childhood is my story, it doesn’t have to be theirs.

As of now, my kids have only been homeschooled. They haven’t be part of a ‘group‘ at school. And, that’s fine. They’re off doing other adventures in life. Just because I went to school doesn’t mean they have to experience the same thing! Read the rest of this entry

5 Easy and Powerful Tips For Helping Siblings Adjust to a New Baby: Aware Parenting

When my oldest daughter was almost 2 1/2, she became a big sister. Everything seemed perfect for a little while… but then, the acting out started. So, I needed to act! Luckily, I was already on the path of aware parenting. I found some really powerful solutions for helping create harmony in the new-baby family dynamic. The things I learned how to do with my daughter were not tricky or time consuming either! The following tips are easy to implement and can be big game changers for when a new baby enters the family. The only trick is remember when to do them!

1. Cut down on unnecessary activies.
I made the mistake of NOT doing this after the birth of my second. For some reason, I felt like it was my duty to run my toddler around and keep her busy. Trips to the park can wait. Maybe they can skip swimming for a term and take it up again in a couple months? If they’re school age, maybe just do less extra curricular activities for a little while. Not only is running around not good for you or your new baby, it will run your older kids down too. Remember, your ‘big kids‘ are experiencing a HUGE upheaval in their lives, so staying close to home and doing less, will really help everyone to adjust.

I remember being older, 7 and 10, when my brothers were born and ANXIOUSLY waiting to get home from school because I missed them so much and I worried about them! Of course, it’s nice for the big kids to get out of the house and carry on with some normal activities, but it probably doesn’t need to be as much as you think. And, sometimes, constantly going out because the big kid seems to have cabin fever can be a sign of pent up emotions, and going out will only serve as a distraction… which leads to the next point… Read the rest of this entry

So, When Do You Do the ‘Lesson’?

When I tell people that we homeschool, one of the first things they ask me is, “So, when do you do the ‘lesson?
 
What they mean is, “When do you sit down at the table and make them read and write?
 
The way we do home education in our family, there is no ‘lesson‘. Learning is incidental. We learn everywhere we go. At the grocery store, while we’re baking brownies, while we’re driving in the car (so many good conversations in the car!) walking to the park, sitting on a comfy couch while I read them library books and yes, occasionally sitting down at the table doing some written stuff (although that’s the rarest activity we do!).
Here’s how one conversation went in our house or you could say, this is how one ‘lesson‘ went, since lots of people want to know.
 
Margo (7) looks at her undies that have a big four leaf clover on the front: “What’s the day after my birthday called again?”
 
Me: “Saint Patrick’s Day”
 
Margo: “And, what’s the day before my birthday?”
 
Me: “The Ides of March.”
 
Margo: “What’s the Ides of March?”

Read the rest of this entry